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Metal Messiah
- Alright, this guy is not attractive
- But he is committed
- Eggs and waffles. Eggs AND waffles
- He draws metal logos, with his metal lunchbox
- Why does this opening remind me of Napoleon Dynamite?
- Comparing their thrash metal, quick vs fast
- Does not like the Goo Goo Dolls
- Haha… TeslAH
- Are these old guys in high school?
- Derek has the hair, the guyliner, the headphones, the headband…
- There seem to be a lot of metal/goths at this school
- Enter Denette, who also looks to be in her early 30s
- I can’t tell if these people have simply failed so many times that they are in high school in their 30s, or if that’s all part of the joke, that we have older actors playing high school kids
- Now Kurt’s guitar is plugged in?
- So, a musical number in the high school cafeteria… this is much better than High School Musical
- This feels like a genuine low budget metal video
- Metal cheerleader
- Necrophiliac
- Meeting the metal Nigerians
- They sound really Jamaican
- That band name is going to be hard to sell
- Rehearsal with the band
- Subtitles for his metal speak
- Band changes its name because trouble
- Whew! Now they’re Black Christ, much better
- He got summoned to the counselor’s office
- Alright, this is serious, we need the room
- The “school department” has an analyst?
- “This AK-47 is my cock”
- Odd vocal echo
- That seems like a talk no school counselor would ever have with a student
- Black Christ’s first show, I’m so excited!
- Good use of camera angles to make four people look like a room full of people
- Alright, this other band might be better
- Lady metal bands are the best
- Sage is really upset about the Nigerians moving back to England
- Inverse subtitles
- Beast Ice is the best beer
- It’s okay if you’re being beat up by a chick
- I guess we’re watching a porno now
- Is that Denette?
- Grabbing each other’s knees during the porn
- Dreamtheater and Queensryche!
- Make it bleed!
- Why is Sage at this nerd’s house? Or are they roommates?
- I’m pretty sure Sage only wears this one Iron Maiden shirt
- You haven’t sold your soul to Satan yet?
- He has all the tools necessary for the satanic ritual on hand
- I guess he has to find a goat now?
- Oh, hi Denette, and she wants to talk about Christian metal bands
- English lesson about “destroyers”
- Sad metal music video
- A guy with a grinder is doing pyrotechnics
- Hello again Denette
- Tell me about your girlfriend
- The key is, everything gets popped
- Haha… Corn Biscuit
- Wait, did Sage just get shot by a guy who just had sex?
- So Sage is in hell now or what?
- Just a nightmare, thank god!
- I am completely onboard with pancakes and coffee
- Renounce Satan, play for Jesus’ team
- Well, that turned quickly
- “You’ll do this for me now that I’ve saved you and all, right? It’s the Christian thing to do.”
- Christianpalooza
- Why does the analyst work here? Ok, that was answered
- These people are really excited for the apocalypse
- Wait, is she Darth Vader?
- You’ll have to know people in the biblical sense
- Jesus is your lawyer
- Who is this guy walking through the park?
- This presentation is happening in a conference room
- The Gay Zone
- No penises in assholes on the whiteboard behind Sage, only P in V
- Oh, I get it, Darth Vader is in porn
- Sage is led into hell? I’m confused
- Wait, is that really how it ended?
- Oh, Vicki Rader, I get it…
- Original music by Western Virus
- What is happening in this credits sequence? Another music video?
